Five ways to stop comparing yourself to others and start coaching your way

Even now, as a coach, I still struggle with questioning my ability and the decisions I make.

I worry about being judged by other coaches or being compared. But over time, I’ve learned that holding onto your identity as a coach is key. It’s okay not to be like anyone else. We all have unique ways of working that are effective for us.  
 
Coaching isn’t one-size-fits-all, and that’s exactly where the game and our male counterparts need to support us: encouraging women to find their own coaching identity, rather than suggesting there’s only one “right” way. 
 
Here’s what’s helped me and what I hope can inspire other women stepping into coaching.

1. Pick the right club 

Your environment shapes your experience. A club that supports growth and respects your approach lets you build confidence in your own style. 

2. Learn from others, don’t feel like you have to copy 

Mentorship and peer support are invaluable, but you don’t have to mirror someone else’s methods. Take what inspires you and adapt it to your own approach. 

3. Embrace your unique strengths 

Every coach brings something different. Your perspective, communication style, and ideas are valid and valuable. 

 
4. Celebrate small wins 

Coaching isn’t just about results on the pitch. It’s about impact - players growing, confidence-building and community forming. Recognise your influence! it’s powerful. 

5. Visibility and representation 

Leading as yourself shows other women and girls that there isn’t just one way to coach. Representation helps the next generation find their voice. 
 
 

Finding your coaching identity isn’t always easy, but it’s worth it. Every woman who steps onto the sidelines doing it her way makes football stronger, more inclusive and more inspiring for everyone.